How to Hit on Arab Girls; Guide Points by a White Man
Claudine Farah
How to land yourself a slap on the face… or, hopefully, in a jail cell.
Follow the “tutorial” of “Saxquiz” on YouTube. He’s an American who is proud of being a student of the Arabic language and here’s what he’s using it for:
“Here are a few phrases you can use to hit on Arab girls. Use with caution 
. I don’t know if I made it clear enough in the video, but these are phrases used in Lebanon, Syria, Jordan, and Palestine. All Arabs will understand you, but they are specifically for that Levantine region.”
He also has a Blog to specifically teach you “How to Hit on Arab Girls.” Not just any girls, mind you, because American girls aren’t edible and telling them “You’re delicious” is “inappropriate.” But Arab girls, not only are they edible, they’re so delicious you can even eat them without salt! And, he even mispronounces it!
Someone should have told this guy that we, the women in these exotic lands where people still ride on camel backs to move about, consider ‘toltish’ as harassment. Aren’t Americans fined and/or jailed for that in their country?
I don’t know about the other Arab countries, but it saddens me to note that here in Lebanon, ‘toltish’ still goes unpunished by our law, heck, sometimes even police officers try to hit on girls. But so far, I’ve never seen a successful love story born out of this kind of, um, “courtship.” Many guys hit on girls just for the fun of it, as one of their many messed up ways to prove their manhood. Rarely does a guy hit on a girl if he were alone. It’s a way to show off, regardless of whether he’s attracted to the girl in question or not or whether he’d like to build some kind of relationship with her or not.
In this video, however, this guy thinks it’s a sure way to win an Arab girl’s heart. No, son, if it doesn’t work on an American girl, it sure as hell won’t work on an Arab one, not a sane, self-respectful one anyway.
This is insulting on so many levels: not only is this guy objectifying women in general, he’s specifically teaching the American white male how to hunt the female of the “Levantine” species in their native language. It’s the epitome of racism, sexism and other –isms and he’s proud of it!
So here’s the problem; ‘toltish’ is an inappropriate, unacceptable behavior on our Lebanese streets and it should be punishable by law and eradicated. But this guy is claiming it’s a good way to meet Arab girls and get positive results. He’s propagating the idea that it’s OK to talk that way to an Arab girl and he’s very sure that he has a good grasp of our culture!
As for the “lesson” itself, let’s see, apart from the outrageous rhyming expressions such as “helo jismik shou ismik?” and “shu hal jasad ya asad,” I hated how he turned a positive Arabic expression into something so vile: “Laban el 3osfur” is something I heard a mother say to her child or lovers (in a real relationship) to one another. It’s ridiculous of him to strip such an expression of its powerful meaning (doing the impossible to someone you deeply care about) in order to say it to a passing stranger.
All I can hope for is that nobody in their right mind would go for that crap. Unfortunately, reading the YouTube comments, it seems that many are impressed by the guy’s ability to speak Arabic and, thus, assume he has great “knowledge” about this strange world.
Category: Featured, Gender-Based Violence
Arabic girls?
” and having good results ” !!!!!!! what a geek !!!! It was a revelation, finally any tourist guy can get TONS of levant chicks around him !!!!
Well dude, i think you should get your glasses back cause with that flash of light ladies wouldn’t have seen your real face. Now you’re screwed ! euh, in english meaning, not in arabic !
It was a tremendous waste of time to watch you,
thanks for the how-to-prove-ur-a-frustrated-chump
tips.
PS: Toqborne means “may you live more than i do
to be able to burry me”, not just “burry me”
that’s how we say it to people we like to see
live longer than we do, it’s not a flirting
sentence otherwise we would all be gays !!!
Poetically DEAD
Why the hustle? If you’re talking about girls with no brains who live by their predefined stereotype it’s enough to be an outsider and you’ll have them all, if you’re an insider and want that kind of girls just hint that you’re marriage material…
Given that I doubt our erstwhile pedant of the Arabic language actually ever attempted any of his ill-advised, politically problematic, racist, misogynistic and, well, pathetic “pick-up” lines, I thought that perhaps we could offer him a series of choose-your-own-adventure scenarios based in Beirut to better inform him (and his You Tube doyens) of the consequences of such gross behavior.
1) “Saxquiz” strolls into a small bar in Gemayzeh and orders a tequila shot (bela mele7). On his right are two women engaged in a tri-lingual dissection of the play they just saw. Saxquiz’s opportunity arises when one of them leaves to answer her phone outside.
Does he:
a) Offer to buy her a drink
b) Introduce himself, saying, “I couldn’t help but overhear your conversation and I found your dialectical analysis really impressive…”
c) Lean over until she notices him and say, in his best Shami, “enti btetakli bala mele7” (getting the pronunciation correct this time)
He, following his own best advice, chooses “c.”
Does she:
a) Sigh and turn away with an expression of vague annoyance
b) Burst out in horrified laughter, and immediately make Saxquiz repeat his pick-up line to the bar staff, all of whom join in the mockery
c) Raise one eyebrow and reply: “Yeah? I could tear your dick off without salt”
2) Following Friday night’s debacle, Saxquiz spends Saturday at a café in Hamra, where he waits in vain to hear anyone speak in Arabic. At last, a nearby table is occupied by AUB students working on a group project for Anthropology 101, two of whom are female.
Does he:
a) Introduce himself and explain that he’s recently started studying at CAMES
b) Interrupt their discussion and ask them about their Anthropology project, as he, too, once took a course in cultural reductionism and general racism, which he aced
c) Lean back in his chair, hands behind his head and feet extended, stare intently at the nearest girl and, having garnered her attention, say, with his best James Bond smirk: “helo jismik, shou ismik?”
As predicted, Saxquiz, chooses “c.”
Does she:
a) Look at him with confusion and then edge her chair away
b) Immediately gather her working group around his table as the Great White Entitled Male subject has finally presented itself for analysis and occasional derision
c) Respond, in perfect CNN English, “My name is Go Fuck Yourself”
3) After considerable contemplation, Saxquiz realizes that the problem lies with the sorts of women he’s been targeting: They’re simply not Arab enough (otherwise, clearly, they’d be all over him by now). The solution? The corniche on a Sunday afternoon. First Saxquiz lurks near a group of pre-pubescent shebab, all of whom are clearly Jedi Masters bi toltish – a status Saxquiz yearns for. Eventually, after the shebab have all gone home (alone), Saxquiz gears up his loins, wedges himself between the railings and perches in wait, as a group of women, three veiled, two not, walk by arm in arm.
Does he:
a) Shut the fuck up because they’re clearly all members of Hizbullah
b) Shut the fuck up because they’re clearly more interested in their own conversation
c) Zone in on the youngest mu7ajiba – the more repressed, the better, no? – and call out: “shu hal jasad ya asad”
We all know what he does.
Does she:
a) Take pity on the miskeen ajnabi who is clearly too far from home and offer him 500 lira
b) Ask him how his career in the State Department is progressing as he has single-handedly perpetuated the very worst stereotype of Americans Abroad
c) Beat him over the head with her purse until he falls into the Mediterranean
hahahahaha…. i love your comment S
True S true.HE look like a arab trough.Lol.If you said the thing whit the salt,anywere in the world you will get beat up by all the bar.lol
I thought this was in good fun – this guy clearly is not saying that these lines will win over Arab women – nobody expects any pick up line any any language to actually “work.”
As a student of several languages, I’ll offer that at some point, all of us find it delightful to learn naughty words and phrases in the language we’re learning – curse words, or, in this case, terrible pick up lines.
His blog is about teaching spoken Arabic, not specifically to teach you how to hit on Arabs, and I think cheesy pickup lines are a pretty entertaining example – you all seem in agreement that Lebanese guys DO actually says things like that, and God know’s I’ve heard worse!
Cdt Schlep is right. I just found these phrases interesting and fun and if you do say them as a foreigner some girls will think it’s cute. I’m sure if I, as an American, say some cheesy pickup line in English to some American girl I just met she’ll think I’m a moron. And if an Arab guy says something like this to an Arab girl then she’ll think the same thing. But if you’re a foreigner then things like this are cute and they’re happy you’re trying to learn the language.
This video got such a bad response. I think it’s mainly due to the title. If I had titled it “Cheesy Arabic Pickup Lines” then no one would have had a problem with it.
And if, as a foreigner, you say something sexist in Arabic, it’s still sexist
@cdt schlep & The Arabic Student:
The point is we’re not monkeys in a circus nor guinea pigs in a lab. As an Arab & as a woman, the video is doubly insulting. Regardless of your gender, if a guy on the street hits on you with those lines, how would it make you feel? I’m sure you’d feel offended if you honestly think about it.
Then you watch a video where an American studying the Arabic language is proudly ‘teaching’ those insults to others as instructions to specifically hit on Arab women (and no, he didn’t imply he was aware of their cheesiness as you suggest), making it seem as if Arab women were some exotic species, unlike American women who would be offended by such words. You should listen again to his comparison and seriously imagine you’re in my place, being the target of that video and those insults on the street. Then tell me how cute this is.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xarc5PFknfw
!!
Exactly! Thank you for the amazing poem Saida; it says it all
Paging Dr Edward Said! Paging Dr Edward Said! Sorry to interrupt you, Sir, I just need to borrow a copy of Orientalism to hit someone over the head with…
WOW!! Is that for real!!Poor guy!!That what i call A REAL STUPID GEEK!!!!HAHAHAH & his proud!!! hahaha!! & he spreading his KNOW HOW!!!HAHAHAHA .I m pretty sure that someone had fun giving him the wrong INFORMATIONS!!HAHHAHAHAH!! Man y made my day!! I HAD ONE OF THIS LAUGH!! (SHOU HAL TAGJI YA NAGJI) HAHAHAHAHA sorry but i can stop laughing!!hahahahah it sooo HILARIOUS!!HAHAHAHAH !! Defnitly y should change the titel !!
ya3eini yabni…danta momken ta5od 3ala 2afak lel sob7, yemken el mara el wa7ida elli momken teddi m3ak t3ouz mennak flous fel 2a5er!!:) u’re some really rascist n sexist yankee
He looks like the long lost son of Meatloaf.